Look what I found!

An entire site devoted to reviewing apps that are most useful and helpful for moms? I can go for that.;)

(click on the pic to go to the site)
(and if you saw the 2 links I posted recently in Pinterest from Babble.com: The Top 50 apps for Kids and The Top 50 apps for moms, they were both from this site.)

Just wanted to share that. Keep telling me about good apps, folks. I know there are more of you out there with some good ones you use! (and thanks to those of you who have answered thus far - I appreciate it!)

That's it for tonight. Good night.:)

Help! We're under attack!!

There are hundreds of these bugs climbing all over my house and I'm sort of freaked out by it.

Anybody know what they are or how to get rid of them?

ewwww . . . you know, I'm usually ok with a few little bugs here and there. But crawling all over my house, my front door, the eaves, my front steps?!? yuck, yuck, yuck!!

Expectancy and Expectation

I recently read The Shack," by William P. Young. I found it very interesting, even though it attempts to explain some things from a theological point of view that I don't necessarily agree with. One of the things that struck me as I read and continues to mull around in my wee little brain is the author's distinction between the terms "expectation" and "expectancy."

Here is how he explains it:

"Let's use the example of friendship and how removing the element of life from a noun can drastically alter a relationship. Mack, if you and I are friends, there is an expectancy that exists within our relationship. When we see each other or are apart, there is expectancy of being together, of laughing and talking. That expectancy has no concrete definition; it is alive and dynamic and everything that emerges from our being together is a unique gift shared by no one else. But what happens if I change that 'expectancy' to an 'expectation' – spoken or unspoken? Suddenly, law has entered into our relationship. You are now expected to perform in a way that meets my expectations. Our living friendship rapidly deteriorates into a dead thing with rules and requirements. It is no longer about you and me, but about what friends are supposed to do, or the responsibilities of a good friend."

What strikes me first of all is how much I pull expectations into all my relationships. I don't think this is necessarily a bad thing. Is it? Manners, common courtesy, basic human interaction and moral conduct: it's all based somewhat on expectations. I smile at someone, I sort of expect them to smile back - and if they don't, I wonder why. I step on your foot, you expect me to say "excuse me" or "I'm sorry." I expect my children to act and behave in certain ways, or to be in the process of learning to do so. Respect, responsibility, kindness, I expect these things of them. I expect my husband to be responsive to my needs, at least to some degree, as he expects the same from me. I expect that my friends will not hurt or betray me.

Our expectations are based on our life experiences, and what we are taught, and our own emotional thermostat, how strongly we feel things, how sensitive we are. All of these things influence each other and play out together.

I have felt that the important thing most of the time is to be upfront and open about my expectations. Communicated clearly. Because we all sort of have unspoken expectations of people, don't we? And we speak of having "reasonable" or "realistic" expectations. The wife of our former prominant Church leader is even quoted as saying "the key to happiness (in marriage) is low expectations" (which I think was meant to be primarily humorous).

I guess my point is that it is very difficult to do away with all of our expectations. Is is even possible?!? Is it desirable?

This quote from the book above seems to make it seem so. And the way it is worded makes it seem that by introducing expectation into our relationships, we change it from a living, changing and miraculous thing into something dead and burdensome.

Expectancy, according to this quote as I understand it, is simply enjoying and anticipating the joy of the relationship. That sounds like what we all want, right?

"That expectancy has no concrete definition; it is alive and dynamic and everything that emerges from our being together is a unique gift shared by no one else."

So how is that done? How is that maintained? How do you balance expectancy with expectation? And can you have both in a relationship? Have you ever experienced a relationship of expectancy without expectation?

I recognize that not everyone will be struck with this dilemma in the same way that I am right now. But I would like to know what anyone else thinks about this. Am I just thinking too much about this? What do you think?!? Let's discuss.

Sleepovers: Let's take a poll

So I've just been thinking about this lately and would like to get your input.

I grew up having tons of sleepovers. Birthday sleepover parties, just with one friend or 2, my house, their house, whatever. I cannot even imagine my childhood without them. And I mostly have positive memories of them. Certainly there was always drama. And sleepy grumpy mornings. And perhaps a couple pranks, scary stories, and other general foolishness.

But there were also innumerable late-night whisperings, secrets told, confidences built, friendships solidified. Some things just don't come out in a friendship until the lights are out and it's late at night. I think it was something worthy and important. It is something I want my kids to experience.

But I know there are many parents these days who have heard the stories of all the trouble kids get into at sleepovers. Not to even mention the scary possibilities of abuse, or being exposed to dangerous things. And they have decided upon the rule: No Sleepovers. Ever.

And so here we are with my oldest daughter going into 6th grade and she has never been to a sleepover and never had a friend to spend the night. In some ways, I feel bad about this. I feel like she is missing out on some really great times. And in some ways, I feel like I'm a "less-than" parent for even suggesting that it would be ok for her to do so. I admit, I would let her if it was a family I knew pretty well. And I would love for her to have a friend over at our house, if she had a friend that was allowed to.

So where do you stand?? And what are your reasonings?

Is it a "never, no never" rule? Only with one friend? Only certain families? After a certain age?Or anything goes?
And do you feel the standard is different for girls and boys?

And if you aren't in the position to really say "yea or nay" quite yet, what are your thoughts on it right now?

I'm just so curious to hear what other people think about this. Please do tell!!

Piano Recital and Violin, too

Around the middle of December, Isaac performed in his Annual Christmas Piano Recital. I really wish I could get a video of his pieces up on here, but I am giving up on blogger video. I've never gotten it to work for me.

So here are some pictures. This would be his 3rd recital (except last year he was running a high fever and couldn't go). He did a really great job and has improved so much. He played an arrangement of "Ode to Joy" and "Joy to the World" and it's so great to hear him playing songs that we recognize!! :)
He even played while we sang along on Christmas Eve.

This is a group shot of the students (Isaac is on the right in the black vest).

Here he is introducing his pieces:

Abigail also learned some Christmas songs on her violin and played in a small party just for the students at her teacher's house. So I didn't get to hear her (and I don't have pictures). She played "Silent Night" and "O Christmas Tree." She is finally taking lessons now from someone other than me and I think that is working out much better for both of us!! I hope she will continue to make good progress now that she is having consistent lessons and practicing.

Anyway - we are very proud of both of them for all of their hard work and for their musical accomplishments so far! We love it.

One thing we haven't figured out is how to continue to afford all these activities for the kids. I always kind of had this thought in my mind that I would like the kids to be able to participate in one physical activity (dance, sports, or something) and one musical instrument. But - it sure does start to add up. Exponentially, it seems. We'd really like to get Samuel started in some things in the next year or so - but our budget is already stretched pretty tight. grrrrr . . .

Anyway - I'd love to hear your philosophies on what to involve your kids in, and how to manage it all (financially and logistically). And do you try to provide more or less equal experiences and opportunities for all your kids? And how do you narrow down all the infinite choices of activities?

I've always felt it's important for kids to develop their talents and try lots of different things and find hobbies that they truly love. I just don't know how to do it all.

Just taking a little Poll

Are you and your family going to get the swine flu vaccine, the seasonal flu vaccine, or both?

Why or Why Not?