Saturday, August 14, 2010

Flashback Friday: Journals #40-44

(sorry this is late)

So this week's journal flashbacking continues through my sophomore year of college and into my junior year (basically most of 1995).

It was during this time that I gradually switched majors from English to Therapeutic Recreation. Maybe some other time I'll explain my thought processes in that decision. It was wrenching.

I continued writing Zac. And sorta dated some other guys too (By the way, I am deliberately omitting much particular mention of any other guys besides Zac - and avoiding any pics of me with anyone else as well. Just in case you've been wondering. I just feel it's better this way, to try not to detract from my overriding purposes in sharing this stuff. Boys are just too distracting. Let's not go there.) ;)

Anyway, most of what I notice from these entries is that I was stressed and tired pretty much all of the time. Mind you, I went to a church school ranked #1 in the nation for "stone cold sober" colleges. I wasn't drinking and partying. But I never ever ever EVER got enough sleep. I fell asleep in class. I fell asleep sitting on the floor in the hallway in between classes. Any chance I got, I would nap. I am a girl who needs sleep. I know this now. I guess I wasn't able to accept that in college.

And it was during this second half of my sophomore year that I somehow got this crazy idea in my brain that I could take 2 classes that met at the same time. I had to get permission to take 19 credit hrs (the usual max is 18). And it involved sending a tape recorder to the class I skipped in order to attend the other class every other week. Yeah. I'm not sure what I was thinking.

But it appears to be a common theme at that time that I thought I was capable of handling much more than I actually could. hahaha. And it fed into more aspects of my life than just academics. I think there is sufficient evidence in several circumstances to determine that I had lost my mind. Really. What was I thinking?!?

Anyway.

Here's an excerpt.

March 10 1995

Can I just tell you all the things that fall into that category?

First - PAINS (starting from the bottom up) my heels and arches, sharp pains in my left ankle, up my shin bone and through my knee, several sets of muscles extremely sore and tender, my new knee injury, headache piercing through my ear and continuing down my neck. Who knows what else.

STRESS - Zoology test now through Mon, religion paper due Tues, religion exam Tues or Wed, ASL Life Event Story due Mon, Creative Writing poem and reading, Health gunk, my 2 research papers due in 2 wks! (and I haven't done much work on either!!) my 311 autobiography due the same week, then the following week a 5 pg book report on a book I haven't started reading. AHHH!! Plus normal schoolwork.

Oh, the joys. :)

And I am having a really hard time digging out pics from this time. I'm not sure where they are and it's driving me nuts! This is pretty much the only one I could find. One of my roommates was taking a photography class and this is me helping her out with an "experimenting with flashlight photography" assignment. I know - it's freaky.


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